Let It Go!

As I was putting on a load of laundry just now, I was thinking of what I need to/should do during Seth's nap and the girls' quiet time.  Then I started thinking of the ridiculous number of things that I think I need to/should do each day and it's crazy.  No wonder so many mommies (some days I include myself in this) feel like we are failing!  I consider a day to be from 5:30 a.m. to 8:00 p.m. (although it usually goes later because of the crazy amount of things on my list), and here are all the things that I put on my list:

• make meals for 4 people twice a day and 5 people once a day (making sure everyone is getting a balanced diet with all the nutrients they need)
• clean up all those meals
• go on a run
• spend a little bit of one on one time with each of the kids
• gather, wash, fold and put away laundry
• take care of the garden
• feed the dog
• play with the dog at least a little
• spend time in my Bible
• spend 15 minutes resting (in the middle of the day)
• keep the house tidy
• shower every couple of days
• brush 4 people's teeth twice a day
• floss all those teeth once a day
• keep in touch with friends (email/cards/texting)
• keep the house stocked with all the necesities
• read at least 20 minutes with the kids
• have the girls each read at least one book to me

I'm sure there are so many more, plus there are the tantrums and fights and spills that take up so many minutes of every day!  Anyway, I am getting much better at "letting things go" since I really can't do all of those things every day and still try and have some time to sleep at night!  Oh ya, and I have a hubby who hardly even made the list, but we all know they have needs too!

Last Day of Kindergarten

Alright, let's see if I can get through this post without crying!  Today was Haley and Abby's last day of kindergarten.  I've said this a hundred times today, but I just can't believe it!  I was just crying about their first day of kindergarten.  This year has FLOWN by (as I was driving to school this morning I was thinking that it won't be long before it's Seth's last day of kinder!).  There is something so special about kindergarten, and both Haley and Abby had wonderful teachers and classmates, making for a great year!

First day of kindergarten.

Last day of kindergarten (Abby is really loving to tuck in her shirts...not my favorite phase!)

Abby and the fabulous Ms. Dorrian

Haley with two of her buddies and her wonderful teacher, Ms. Schewe (Shayvee)

Pete The Pirate

We got a dog.  At this point it's been almost three months, but it's still a little crazy to me.  We've been saying "no dogs 'till no diapers" for quite a few years now, and we finally made it to the "no diapers" part!

Seth potty trained last fall, and the kids were pretty quick to start asking for a dog.  Carey and I decided that we wanted a dog that doesn't shed, is medium sized (not so small that the kids can easily carry it, but not so big it makes our house feel small), and is a rescue or someone's pet that they couldn't keep any more.  I was mostly looking on Craigslist, hoping for a standard poodle that someone had to let go.  I also checked the local animal shelters, but they were basically always 90% chihuahuas!

One day, when I was checking on Craigslist, I saw a cute dog named "Pictor Galaxy" that was in a foster home through a rescue organization in San Fransisco.  He was a schnauzer mix and medium size and really cute, so we made a date to go up and meet him.  When we went to meet him, I made the kids wear all black, and any fleece that they had, because I really wanted to make sure he didn't shed (schnauzers don't, but we didn't know about the "mix" part)!  Anyway, he was a keeper, so we took him home and renamed him Pete the Pirate.

When he first came home, he was kind of shut down.  He just stayed in his bed, not really interested in treats or toys.  It was three days before I heard him bark.  After about a week, though, he was used to us and his new home and now is a super happy puppy.  We just finished training (with THE BEST TRAINER) and he's a great, smart, sweet puppy. 

We all love Pete.  The kids will tell you that he really is a pirate, because he loves to steal their stuffed animals and shoes!

This is when we first meet Pete!

The Library (of all places)!

This afternoon we had our worst injury to date.  Of all the fighting and wrestling and jumping and daredeveling my kids do, the injury took place at the public library!

This afternoon, I was planning on picking Abby and Haley up from school and going to the library.  My friend Nicole called and asked if I could pick up her daughter (who is in Haley's class), since her son was still napping.  We planned that I would take her daughter with us and Nicole and her son would meet us at the library when he woke up.

We all checked out our books and were walking out of the library together, trying to wrangle the five kids (between the two of us), our purses, and our bags packed full of freshly checked-out picture books.  Abby was holding a purple, fairy book that she was particularly excited about, and spinning around.  Seth came up behind her, and she spun right into him, whacking him in the face with the book. 

That girly, purple fairy book gave Seth quite a cut on his forehead.  The girls were freaking out, as there was a lot of blood (like any head cut will have!), and I was trying to figure out how bad it was.  Nicole and I decided I should take him to the doctor, since he likely needed stitches.  She took Haley home with her, and Abby, Seth and I headed to the doctor. 

In the car, Abby was just feeling so badly, and Seth was doing that gaspy breathing that comes after crying really hard.  He kept looking at his hand, which was fairly bloody, and saying that he wanted to go home.  I was on the phone with the doctor's office, and couldn't get my blue tooth to connect while I was already talking on the phone.  I decided that if someone pulled me over for talking on my phone, I would just point to the bloody kid in the back of the van and they would let me go on my way!

At the doctor's office, Seth was SO brave (can't quite say the same for Abby) and got all cleaned up and checked out.  The doctor decided that it wasn't so deep that she had to do stitches, and that she would try glue, even though it was a little longer than she would normally like to use glue on.  Oh, and when she was gluing it, I suggested to Abby that she sing Seth a song.  So she started to sing "Jesus Loves Me", which I don't think the doctor liked much, 'cause she told Abby to sing something more "upbeat".  So Abby sang "Deck the halls with jars of jolly...uh, I don't really know the rest"!

So, now Seth is all glued up and not supposed to do any "physical activity", like riding bikes, climbing, jumping on the trampoline, basically any of the things that he spends his days doing...for 2 weeks!  I don't think it's really going to take that long to heal, but we'll see how well we do with books and puzzles and playdough.

I am so thankful that I had picked up Ella and that Nicole was there to give me a second opinion and take Haley home with her.  I'm so thankful that it got Seth's forehead and not his eye.  I'm so thankful that the doctor's office got us in right away.  And I'm so thankful that this little cut is really the Webber kids' worst injury yet.  Oh, and that it all happened at the library, of all places, because that's just funny!

all glued up!

He Is Risen!

The church has an old, old Easter tradition to proclaim "He is risen" to which the response is "He is risen indeed".  My kids LOOOOVE this tradition.  They especially love to be the first one to say it, and for others to respond to them.  A few days before Easter a friend of ours was saying goodbye, and that she'd see us on Easter, and I asked the kids what they would say to her on Easter.  Abby quickly responded "Is He risen?  He is risen indeed."!

On Good Friday, the Friday before Easter that we remember Christ's death on the cross, I drew a red dot on the palms of our hands to remind us of the price the He paid for us.  We read the crucifixion story out of our favorite kids Bible.  The kids were really impacted by this and we will definitely do it again next year.

Easter morning we went to our church's worship gathering and celebrated with our church family.  After the gathering we had an egg hunt for the kids, which they loved (of course).  That afternoon we had a bunch of friends and family over and had a great time hanging out in the backyard.

I just love Easter.  I'm so thankful that it was sunny and warm and that we had so many fun friends and family to spend it with.  Most of all, I'm so in love with my Jesus, who gave His life so I didn't have to, and who gives me new life each day!

Quite possibly the best Easter outfit ever!

Checking out their goodies from our backyard hunt!

"Real Mom"

So a couple months ago we had a park date with Haley and Abby's biological mom (aka "tummy mom"), and literally, 1 second, if that, after closing the car door and driving away, Abby said "Mom, I already miss Momma Robin.  When I see her walk away, it's like I miss her so much in my heart."  I don't know why, but it was the first time it hit me that Carey and I are not God's best for them.  I know that we are part of His redemption plan, which is awesome, but the ideal is for children to be well loved and cared for by their biological parents.  I spent the rest of the drive home thinking about that.  I didn't feel sad, just humbled, I guess, if that makes any sense.  I am not God's best for my daughters.  I am not the ideal, original plan.  Not to say that I am not good enough, or I am not the best in this situation, because I know that this is all part of God's plan.

Side-note:  I don't think I've ever said this on my blog, but when I was 22 I started praying for twins.  That's kind of an odd thing to do, but looking back, I know that it was something the God gave to me to pray for!  Also, the week that Haley and Abby came to live with us was a week that, months earlier, I had been asked to be the speaker up at my favorite summer camp, Camp Hammer.  When I had been asked to speak, I wanted to do it so badly, but, as I prayed about it, I felt like I needed to say no.  I struggled with it a bit, because I love Camp Hammer so much, I jump at any opportunity to be there, and I couldn't see any reason why I shouldn't say yes.  But, finally I was obedient to what I felt God saying, and I turned down the offer.  It was about two weeks after our daughters came to live with us that I realized the week they came home was the same week I would have been speaking at camp if I had said yes.

Anyway, it's an emotional, scary (for me), wonderful, heart-breaking, faith-building thing to be an adoptive parent.  I love my daughters so much, but the joy that I have at them being my daughters come with a primal wound that they will always have, that I can not heal for them. 

The other day, Abby's teacher (who we LOOOOVE) told me that Abby was telling the class a story for share time and said "A long time ago, when I still lived with my tummy mommy, before I lived with my real mommy..."  I just about burst into tears when she told me that.  Not because I feel like I need to mean more to her than her bio mom, but because that's how she thinks of me...as her mom. 

As the girls have been in kindergarten, I have seen them trying to figure out who they are and how they relate to the world on their own, with out me.  It's been precious and hard at the same time, to let them (especially Haley) struggle through, and I know this is only the beginning.

I guess this post is kind of rambly and maybe boring, but it's such a big part of our life, it is our life, and it's been on my mind a lot lately.  Just tonight I asked Haley if she misses momma Robin and if she thinks about her very often.  She said no, but I wonder if that's true.   I never know the balance of bringing it up, so they know it's not a forbidden topic and that their feelings about being adopted are valid, no matter what they are, and just letting it go and let them bring it up.

Haley the day she came home to live with us

Abby the day she came home to live with us

Our adoption finalization

The girls' biological mom

How hard is it to believe that these three don't share the same genes?!

Where were we in February?

I just realized that I didn't post anything on the blog in February.  Yikes!  How will I ever remember those days if it's not recorded on the blog!  Here's a few snapshots of our lives last month!

Seth and his buddy building block towers

I don't really know why little girls love to pick each other up, but they sure do.  Haley and Abby are always trying to pick up their friends and visa versa. 

We went to the Monterey Bay Aquarium on Superbowl Sunday.

Ready for another day at school.

On our way to school

On the roller coaster at Happy Hollow

Frog Hopper...they laugh the whole time!